Deep in the dark

Sep 12, 2012

Keira didn't fall asleep until near mid night. This is so unlike her. I gave her a bottle before we settled in bed at 9.30pm. But she still refused to sleep and kept tossing around.

I got mad at her and threw her out of the room. She cried. Daddy came to console her. It's 10.30pm. She kept still but eyes wide open. She wants more milk. I am reluctant to give her. This is her punishment for not wanting to finish off her dinner. I warned her.

Then she said she want to pee. I said go ahead yourself. I asked why don't you sleep? She said I'm hungry. And I gave in. She fell asleep right after the milk.


Oh lord. I have been trying to spruce up their meals but yet she has not been eating as much as I want her to.
I do not like the idea of substituting her missed dinners with milk.

Sometimes I really do not know what to do and will hide in the bathroom and tear. P/S: not exactly over this incident but other incidents as well.

I am so tired from all the coaxing to threatening to screaming to yelling and last but not least time out. Did my parenting skill go wrong somewhere?

I did try to seek advice sometimes but all I got were my baby don't do that. My baby can do that. My baby no longer do that. Hello! I asked because I wish to know what you have been doing to your children. I of course think you did a good job. I can tell that's why I asked. I am not trying to hear all these and then seeing you giving me smirking/proud face while expecting for praises. When your child is really an angel child, we know. Seriously. I am not jealous but feel you are truly blessed. But please, don't make me think likewise. It is just plain irritating.

Anyway, I just do what I can and know what's best for them. Maybe like what my mum say. They are just the way they are. Kids will change one day when you don't even realize that. I am holding on to her words which I have a feeling it might come true one day.

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